This Man In My Life
He loves God, his family, working on old cars and making people happy. He thinks so much of me that most of the time, I know I don’t deserve it. He’d give you the shirt off his back, the food out of his freezer, or the gas out of his truck if he thought you needed it. His yearning to walk closer to God is so tangible. His desire to let God make something out of him is admirable. His love for his family is evident no matter where we are in our relationships, and his need to take care of us is so, so valuable to me. To watch him interact with his son is something I’ll treasure for as long as I live, because I’ve never been witness to such a strong, sweet and loving bond between a father and his child. He’s so forgiving, sometimes I worry that somebody will take advantage of him. He worries about money. He worries about our safety. He worries that he’ll someday be “that dad” that always has to work during his son’s baseball games. He genuinely can’t wait to get back home when he’s gone.
This year will be our 5th wedding anniversary (August 6)…my, how time flies! Five years ago this month, we were walking across the stage receiving our high school diplomas. Five years ago, we were looking at our college degree plans and signing up for classes. We were just beginning our LAHS (that’s Life After High School), and had no idea what the next 5 years had in store! And yes, 5 years ago this month, Daryl was asking me to be his wife! A lot of girls would have had doubts about marriage at 18 years old…not this girl! When he asked, I knew I had to say yes. I love him! We’re soul mates, brought together by God. How could I not marry him?
Every once in awhile, I’m reminded of how blessed I am to have Daryl in my life. No, he’s not perfect. I’m not going to pretend he is. I have scars on my heart from some little hurts…trials we’ve faced together. We argue about silly things, but we always make up. We have to agree to disagree sometimes, which is really hard for my bossy, overbearing, “I’m right” personality. When I do something stupid, he doesn’t chastise me for it. He doesn’t get angry. In fact, sometimes I’m amazed by exactly how forgiving he can be.
When I found out I was pregnant with James (via about 6 home pregnancy tests), I was absolutely shocked. We had only been married for 6 months, and a baby wasn’t in the plan! I worried so much that he’d be upset with me, I didn’t tell him for days after I knew. We were laying in bed one night, lights out, and I couldn’t hold it in any longer. Through sobs and sniffles, I told him something like “I’m pretty sure you’re going to be a Daddy. I’m so sorry! Are you mad?” and I’ll never forget the words or the tenderness in his voice when he said to me “How could I be mad about having a child with the woman I love?”
A lot of people don’t know how horrible I was to live with in the last few months of my pregnancy. In fact, I’m pretty sure Daryl is the only one that has any idea. I got so depressed, hormonal and downright cranky that I even threatened to go back to Texas without him until James was born. Looking back, I can see how hurtful that was. I can see how much my rejection probably broke his heart in that moment. No matter how bad the fight, he has never once threatened to leave me alone, and I don’t know what I would do if he did.
He has never stopped working one day since we got married. He wants me and James to have everything we need, and even everything we want (I always tell him that’s really not practical!). He thinks in terms of “What will make them happy?” and not “What do I want for me?” in almost every situation. About 6 months ago, we decided we could afford for me to quit my job and be a full time stay-at-home-mom with James. With that decision came another a few months later: we were ready to have another child. At the end of February, I found out I was about 6 weeks pregnant, and one short week later, I miscarried. Daryl was on a business trip from the day I found out we were expecting all the way until the day I miscarried, and I don’t think I’ll ever know exactly how much it killed him to not be here for any of it.
Between the two of us, he’s definitely the more fun-loving. In fact, he’s so energetic that sometimes it gets on this party-pooper’s nerves! When he gets excited about something, it’s really hard not to jump right on board with him. He lights up when he has a good idea, and it’s almost funny to watch him take off with it! The difference in our personalities is quite large really, but somehow God knew we’d be perfect for each other. We take turns being the “practical one” – sometimes it’s just more fun to dream! Sometimes I have to pull him back to reality, and it’s sad to see his dream burst. Sometimes he has to pull me back to reality, and it’s good to know that he’s there to do that. We make decisions together, and try to follow God’s plan for our lives.
Five years. It’s flown by so fast. We have an amazing marriage full of love, joy, and best of all Christ. We have a 3 1/2 year old son that is an absolute blessing to our life. We have a home (even though it’s not in Texas!!), some land, and a great family that’s always there when we need them. Sometimes I can’t believe how much God has blessed my life. I’m privileged to be Daryl’s wife and thrilled to be able to walk through the years with such a respectable, honorable, Godly man.
How Do I Love Thee?
Elizabeth Barrett Browning
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of being and ideal grace.
I love thee to the level of every day’s
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for right.
I love thee purely, as they turn from praise.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints. I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.